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— Iain Thomas, I Wrote This For You (via larmoyante)

fvkstyles:

"Get in the car princess, daddy’s taking you shopping."

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"Daddy’s has to work hard today so he can spoil you later."

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"That’s right baby doll, swing the mallet just like daddy showed you."

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"I’m in a rush little one, whatever you want just charge it to daddy’s credit card."

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Anonymous: My boyfriend & I usually have sex on the floor behind his bed so when you walk in you can only see the bed. And we were having sex one day & I was on top and his mom walks in and she can't see him but she can see me with my shirt on, and she's asking me where he is and I'm sitting on his dick & he's on the bottom trying not to laugh and moving around to make me make faces. And we were talking for like 15 minutes while I was sitting on his dick and having pleasant talk with his mom. NEVER AGAIN.

necromorph-slayinglovemachine:

whoalucas:

i don’t give a fuck about 5sos hooking up with groupies i give a fuck that the jonas brothers hooked up with groupies i honestly thought they were virgins

kissesforyourloving:

prejaculate:

imagine if you had to wait until you were 21 to drink alcohol

not sure if someone from another country posted this or a very enthusiastic underage drinker

just-relatable:

Relatable posts daily?

just-relatable:

Relatable posts daily?

(Source: snitchykermit)

duragdaddy:

I HAVE NEVER SEEN A VINE THAT IS SO PERFECT AND IS A SPITTING IMAGE OF HOW I ACT WHEN THIS SONG COMES ON OMG

(Source: milah-mee)

— Five things I am trying very hard to accept (via aumoe)

(Source: blamecalum)